This is my first post to you. I'm your mommy! I decided to write to you today because tomorrow we find out if you are a boy or a girl. Ah! While that is very exciting, the truth is that it doesn't matter either way. Your daddy, your sister and I will adore you no matter if you are boy or girl, no matter how you look, how you talk... no matter what. That's what being a parent means. No matter what you do in your life, no matter how crazy or stupid we may secretly think it is, we will still love the heck out of you! I know I've done some really dumb stuff, and my parents (your Mimi and Poppy!) love me more than anything... Well... except for maybe you and your sister. They are pretty obsessed with you guys.
So, before we find out if you are going to be a little brother or sister, I want to let you know just how much you already mean to me. You are my second baby, which makes some things a little different. For example, I already know kind of what to expect while pregnant. I already knew about when I would feel you kick. I already knew what that would feel like. I already know what vitamins I like to take. I already know what helps me when I'm nauseous. I already know what seeing the ultrasound of your baby for the first time is like. The funny thing is, though, that even though I have been through all of this before, it is absolutely no less exciting and no less terrifying. Not at all. I still got super excited when I felt you kick for the first time. I still cannot wait to see you on that ultrasound screen tomorrow. And I am just as nervous this time around for bringing you home. Having a baby is a scary thing! It completely changes your life! Your sister changed me from an immature college weirdo to a more mature mom weirdo. And now my life is about to change again with you! As nervous as that change makes me, though, I know it will be the best thing for me. With Madelyn, I had no idea even how to put a diaper on. I did not know anything about being a responsible adult (even though I thought I did...), and she came in and shook everything up and freaked my life out and I didn't know how to do anything anymore! But every time I looked at her, all the change became worth it, and I realized that before her, my life had no real meaning. And now, my life will mean even more when I meet you for the first time.
My point is that just because I have already had a baby, it doesn't make having you even a little bit less special or exciting. That's just the amazing truth of having kids. You don't think you could ever love anyone more than your first child, and then you find out your pregnant again, and you feel just as happy and in love! So while things with you will be different because I already know certain things, I also know that the love and excitement I felt, and still feel, for your sister, I will feel the exact same for you.
Now this post is pretty sweet and normal. If you have seen your sister's blog, I tend to ramble and say weird stuff so just prepare for that. I like to ease my children into my crazy.
I will leave you with this peek into what your childhood is about to be like:
And with that, I will say that I love love love love you. I cannot wait to meet you, and I cannot wait to see you on that ultrasound screen tomorrow.
Be you; You're enough.
-Mommy
